And I, in this center of this circle of love and support, was scared out of my mind.
I was scared I would tear. I was afraid of the pain. And I was terrified of becoming a mother. I was afraid I wouldn't have the strength to soothe my child when he would cry at 2am. Then 3am and 5am. I was feared I would lose my freedom. I was dreaded that I would forever be torn between my work and my family and would need to give up working fervently for organization that I loved so.
And in the middle of this fear came another surge, and an instinct stronger than fear took hold. I went inside, to a cave I had curled up in through countless waves of pain and exhaustion through my labor. My body pushed. It was doing what it needed to do. A scared girl went into that cave with each contraction. And as I pushed my baby out of my body, a mother emerged.